Masks
by Fanwoman
Summary: A pair of double drabbles about the Captain and Lieutenant of 10th Squadron. Beware of spoilers.


SPOILERS: Through the Bounto storyline; there are probably lots of spoilers for those who only watch the Cartoon Network.

NOTES: This idea wouldn't leave me alone, so I had to write it down. Many combinations of Captain and Lieutenant among the Shinigami seem to pair nearly opposite personalities. Despite the differences, each combination seems to share a vital trait: Byakuya and Renji have unflinching resolve to do what they believe is right; Zaraki and Kusajishi both enjoy a good fight above all else; Unohana and Kotetsu are devoted to healing. The quality Hitsugaya and Matsumoto seem to share is the ability to hide and work around their secret personal issues, which have been exacerbated by what Aizen did. The idea that they wear their facades of dourness and conviviality to hide their private pain from the world is what inspired this pair of double drabbles...that and the angst the current opening gives me. Yeah, I know the openings don't necessarily mean anything, but... Anyway, I only watch the anime; I don't read the manga. _So, please, no spoilers in reviews._ Unbetaed.

DISCLAIMER: _Bleach_ and all things associated with it belong to other people.

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MASKS 

He acts like a grumpy old man, and in our need for his skills, everyone conveniently forgets how young he really is. So no one else sees it. The most others get is a rare glimpse of a mild expression when he has a moment to himself and is relaxed enough to remove the mantle of authority. No one else notices how he saves reviewing fourth squadron's reports for times when he's alone. Like a cruel toy hidden in his sleeve, he privately pulls out his misery over Hinamori and examines it with frustrated focus. As a prodigy, I don't think he's ever dealt with failure, so it seems he has yet to accept that he can't fix this. It doesn't matter that he was the only one to suspect the truth; to him, he has failed her and the Soul Society by not unraveling Aizen's deception soon enough to stop him. Was that a part of the plan? Did Aizen make sure Hinamori would be broken so that a part of my Captain would be broken, too? I worry about what might happen when those two meet again. Knowing his strength lies in order and control, will Aizen again drive him to recklessness? With the powers Aizen has gained, will it matter how well any of us fights? Despite how angry I am for my Captain's sake, I dread the possibility that, when the time comes, there won't be much I can do about it. Until then, since he'd reject any attempt at consolation, I do my best to keep him distracted and remind him of the simple pleasures of the world he strives to preserve.

* * *

She thinks it's a secret, but I know about her relationship with Ichimaru. I know she feels betrayed by him, not only as a Shinigami but also as a woman. No matter how lively she acts, how much she distracts herself with maintaining morale and order in our squadron, there are moments when it slips out. At those times, the haunted, hurt look in her eyes is almost unbearable, and it stirs a cold helplessness in me. There are countless protocols for an endless variety of situations, but there is nothing in any book that can guide me though this. I don't know what to do, and there is no one I can ask for advice without revealing her secret. So I say nothing and give her more duties to keep her mind occupied--with our squadron in charge, and three Captains gone along with the Office of 46, there is no end to the work. Unfortunately, I know I'm just putting off the inevitable. In spite of the constant paperwork and meetings, the infinite details and bureaucracy, I know this issue can't be avoided indefinitely. The time will come when we'll have to confront Ichimaru, and the thought of it makes my blood run cold because, no matter my intellectual prowess, I can not see into the hearts of others. Will she truly be able to lift her sword against him? If she can't, will I be able to save her from him and herself? 


End file.
